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 An eccentric and volatile person, his pursuit of knowledge was accompanied by the sort of hedonism only the very rich can enjoy. The results of experiments he and his assistant Hodges undertook were never published. As he kept no log-book, the main record of the discoveries they made are the letters he wrote to Michael Faraday. In this book, those letters are presented, together with contemporary reports, a journal Glitch made of his expedition to Africa, and several narratives of his life. Also, reference is made to both his ancestors and, in detail, his descendants.
Free samples from the book are available for your delectation. Please read warnings & disclaimer at the bottom of this page. Contains very strong language. The letters and accounts of the work of Ernest Glitch are of an appalling nature, containing references to animal and human experimentation, extreme violence, Victorian drug abuse, and complete disregard for the dignity of native peoples. 381 pages. 132 thousand words.  eBook available for immediate download $2.99 
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CONTENTS - Subject titles in black are available only with the purchased download.
Red hot Ammonites & Nitric Acid.
The Glitch Steam Engine. Requiring neither water nor coal.
A powerful hydrogen peroxide engine-part interacts with a South American camelid.
Glitch Steamer - The Locomotive.
Aycliffe man disemboweled by an African vulture.
Great Fire & Explosion at Gateshead & Newcastle.
56 dead, rivers of molten sulphur, massive destruction, Faraday implicated.
CUBIC EGGS part one.
Glitch & Hodges - their descendants, in the second millenium. They invent a device which makes them the richest people ever to live. The ensuing chaos is of a global nature.
The 1855 Grand National Steeplechase at Aintree.
The front page from the April 1855 issue of "The Turf" refers to equestrian enhancement of a scientific nature.
Victorian Nitrogen Laser.
A letter from Glitch to Faraday, dated June 1856, would appear to indicate the observation of laser action in air, more than a century before Maiman's ruby laser or Javan's helium-neon laser. Or indeed, H.D.Heard's 1963 nitrogen laser.
Fictional Influence Machine.
Predating Wimshurst`s electrostatic generator, using hemispherically terminated charge carriers.
(This actually predates "Victorian Nitrogen Laser.")
Fullerenes Discovered in Victorian England
A letter from Ernest Glitch (son of Mad Judge Glitch) to Michael Faraday appears to note the crystallisation of C60 some 150 years before Kroto detects the allotrope.
Victorian Liquid-Fuel Rocket Engine
An account of the use of hypergolic propellants and deLaval nozzles in 1856.
Victorian Tesla Coil, with reference to a possible medieval Coil.
A letter from Glitch to Michael Faraday appears to note the discovery of Germanium some 30 years before Winkler. The main body of the correspondence concerns a lightning machine.
Transcranial magnetic stimulation.
Glitch performs an experiment upon his own brain.
19th Century Jet-Powered Flying Machine in Weardale.
Powered Manned Flight achieved long before the Wright Bros., using Multiple Valve-less Pulse Jets.
The First Flight.
part two of 19th Century Jet-Powered Flying Machine in Weardale, plus
The Steam-Powered Rope-Engine - Mad Judge Glitch`s Power-Gallows - An account of the first test of this capital punishment machine.
Victorian Cyclotron
E. Glitch bombards diamonds with high energy particles to produce coloured 'fancy' stones. His equipment, mentioned in a letter to M. Faraday, pre-dates that of Lawrence by some 73 years
Faraday's lecture debacle.
"Chemical History of the
Candle" disrupted by conflagration of Falco
peregrinus.
Glitch Constructs Hypersonic Gun.
Upper Weardale was impacted by several projectiles in late 1857, in Glitch`s words, "Velocities approached 70,000 furlongs to the hour, Bishop."
Trout fishing using electrolytically generated
gas explosions.
A butler's lungs detonate & the effect of acceleration on a closed system of buoyancy.
The Ernest Glitch Expedition To America 1858.
Glitch decides his War Poisons could have excellent commercial potential in the USA.
Sporting activity aboard a transatlantic steamer.
A rather unfortunate incident with explosive rifle ammunition.
Twenty three days later. Virginia City, Nevada.
Hodges is mistaken for a wanted gunfighter, One Handed Thompson.
Ernest Glitch, Power Mountaineer.
The Ascent of El Capitan in Yosemite Valley by a
Steam-Limpet.
The Deal.
Mescaline Cacti for Volcanic Repeating Rifles;
Geronimo meets Glitch.
The Glitch Ranunculaceous Death-Spray.
An anti-personnel weapon of self defense, for use against robbers and other undesirable blackguards.
Some 150 years before US law enforcement officers were issued with Mace and CS gas sprays, Ernest Glitch demonstrated a lethal precursor using an alkaloid extracted from Aconitum napellus.
Preparing to return to Blighty from San Francisco.
Glitch & Hodges have to flee the USA, because of unpleasantness regarding a demonstration of mass-poisoning.
CUBIC EGGS part two.
Military interest causes concern.
1858: First X-Ray?
Rupert Glitch photographs his own bones
The Glitch Sporting Bathyscaphe
Accounts of the use of this extreme depth marine hunting vessel.
The Glitch Machine Gun.
A fully automatic weapon 24 years before Hiram Maxim.
Observation of Light Emission from Electrically Stressed Silicon Carbide Crystals
Early LED? Letters to Faraday, with an account of country life between them, also mentioned is C60 in coal fulgurites.
Hodges & the Golden Fly
Gold-nucleation experiments produce a jewel and the promise of unlimited wealth. Work is suspended because of a successful test of Glitch`s Cacodyl Offensive Weapon
The Great Geysir & One Cubic Foot of Metallic Sodium.
The Iceland geochemical expedition. Mission, to impart a scientific understanding of hydro-geothermal processes to the indigenous population.
Volcanic Bomb.
From Stromboli, Glitch pours scorn on a contemporary academic. "... but Darwin‘s grasp of the
fluid dynamics regarding a globule of solidifying
effervescent viscous lava in free-fall is
feeble!"
The Glitch Equatorial Africa Expedition.
Radium! A highly active deposit of radio-baryte crystals is discovered. Autumn 1861. A Journal of Events by Ernest
Glitch.
Weapon of Mass Destruction in Victorian Times: The Coal-Dust Flame-Thrower.
Horror weapon invented in Weardale by Glitch. Also in 1862, his assistant noted the depletion of U235 in pitchblende from Oklo, and suggested that a natural reactor could be the cause of the isotopic anomaly.
Potassium Bromide; Illuminator & Castrator.
"An astonishing cold orange glow simultaneously appears, and is most beautiful to observe in a darkened room." Wolfhound Training a la Glitch.
The Glitch Electro-Magnetic Cannon.
A badger-flea is accelerated to well over the speed of sound, and survives.
Paleometeorite Unearthed in Victorian Coal-Mine.
A magnificent fossil meteorite found in the Durham Coal Measures is classified as a paleopallasite.
Ecinoderm parasite disturbs porpoise repast.
Horse doctor has his severely shattered arms splinted with sperm whale metatarsals.
Physeter Macrocephalus Farmed Inland for Spermaceti & Ambergris.
A force-fed sperm whale, raised from a calf, grew to fill a brine filled pit dug into a Weardale carboniferous limestone quarry.
Beagle 2 - A 19th Century Hybrid Coal / Liquid Nitrous Oxide Powered Rocket.
Busty seam coal & laughing gas propels scientific probe into space, successfully launched 24th July 1863 from Teesdale, returning 30th June 1908 over Siberia.
Great Balls of Brown Gas!
The preparation of a green solid from Liquid Air & experiments with the oxides of nitrogen. Also, Thai Boxing in Victorian London; combat between Hodges and a Muay Thai fighter.
CUBIC EGGS part three.
Global Holocaust.
Jacko Macauco, Fighting
Monkey
Hodges' CO2 powered artificial hand is brutally shot in a London drinking emporium.
Slowsilver discovery north west of Kyzyl.
Natural, crystalline Hg collected for the first time. Plumbum rod siphon for quicksilver. Self priming.
An Ingenious Method for the Preparation of Large Mercuric Iodide Crystals.
A single crystal is used to detect radioactivity, the output being amplified by a Victorian transistor.
Cosmic Ray Muons Detected and Tracked 1864.
The spark chamber was then utilised to predate Marconi`s wireless transmission apparatus by 45 years.
Epidermal Quicksilver.
Hodges becomes ill due to terminal mercury poisoning.
Z-pinch X-rays and Levitation.
Photography of the internal structure of a flea, the levitation of an aluminium sphere using an oscillating electromagnetic field, and coronal levitation.
Michael Faraday in Possession of Glitch`s Thallium & Oil of Vitriol Balm.
A hand delivered note, accompanying the pharmacological preparation, is dated Sunday the 25th of August 1867.
Advanced Metallurgy in Neolithic Weardale.
The ancestors of Glitch & Hodges are the first technocratic shamen. Pre-bronze age compass needles produced using the Earth's magnetic field.
The download must be considered adult material, containing very strong language and unsuitable for those of a nervous disposition. Should you download the book, please do not attempt to replicate any of the work of Glitch & Hodges. No liability will be accepted for death, injury or damage arising from experimentation using any information found therein.
"Queen Victoria correctly jostled the mummified badger`s arse in front of Hodges` infested crotch, and a fine example of Paraceras melis jumped over." page 272, Glitch Electromagnetic Cannon. Paraceras melis - the badger flea.
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